Prostitute Disfigurement - Deeds Of Derangement

Before I start, let me just say that this band has one of the most awesome names in the history of all that is grindcore and death metal. Fuck! It's such a brutal name, and one that still gets thinking "dayuuuum, that's nasty" even after years of immersion in this type of shit. They are from the Nederlands too, so they must hate the window-based red light districts there with a passion, with a name like that. Shit, imagine the customer / working girl conversation that could potentially unfold if one of the band visited a window! Imagine this tiny little Romanian blonde letting this huge, burly and sinister looking death metaller into the room and asking innocently enough, "so honey, what do you do for a living?". "Well, I'm in a death metal band called Prostitute Disfigurement and I think we are going to have a lot of fun..." Hahaha! She'd be popping that police alarm with less subtlety than Edna Krabappel and her independent thought alarm.

But, as usual, I digress. On with the music! Deeds of Derangement opens with a million-mile-a-minute blast-a-thon, throwing you right into PD's sick and twisted world. The vocals are a strange mix between a guttural low and a pig squeal, the guitars are audible, chugging pools of mud and the drums are surprisingly clarified; the blasts are equal, moderate in volume across the board and rock-steady, yet the use of triggers, if any, is very understated indeed. Great production job! As the songs sail by I notice an almost melodic edge to some of the riffage here, harking back to more traditional death metal approaches, rather than sticking to the ultra-brutal template and soldiering through an entire album with little to no variation.

It freaks me the fuck out that this album is nearly 11 years old, as it was only 3 years old when I first downloaded it back when I was still in school. It sure as hell doesn't sound 11 years old. Sometimes death metal work, whilst staying relevant, can sound rather dated mainly due to the production styles used, but Deeds of Derangement is an extremely organic sounding record that could have been recorded yesterday for all I know. It's great shit. You can stream the entire album in the link below. Originally released on CD by the defunct Morbid Records, which is now merged and under War Anthem Records.

Witch Cult / Drainland - Split Tape

Well, this is one short-ass tape. I should have seen it coming really, going on the Witch Cult live sets that I've experienced. This tape is Witch Cult to the core; starting off with some building harsh noise before ramming head-on into a grinding fury of total chaos and speed.

Drainland have only two songs here, but they are really good; I just wish it lasted a bit longer (then maybe this review could be as well ha ha). 

I got this at Witch Cult's last ever show, up in Brizzle, supporting Despise You on some fairly-big grind/powerviolence/crappy-hardcore bill. It was a crazy show, albeit one that lasted mere minutes, and included a human pyramid and a long outro track that sounded suspiciously like an Electric Wizard cover. It was great, though! I've only seen them twice but they will be missed.

Insane Clown Posse - The Riddle Box

Insane Clown Posse are a band that get incredible amounts of ridicule the world over. Luckily for me, here in little ol' Wales, ICP and their seemingly endless armies of retarded, redneck juggalo "fans" aren't really a subject for ridicule, as they don't really exist. When I was big into ICP as a teenager, I didn't know a creeping shit about any of this juggalo crap. I'm not claiming ignorance as an excuse; I knew that fans painted themselves up for gigs, and that ICP always referred to fans as juggalos. But, that was about it. That's no big deal, right? I mean, Slipknot call their fans "maggots", or in a different musical world, Lady Gaga refers to her die-hard followers as "little monsters". The juggalo phenomena that has swept America over the last 15/20 years really didn't register with me until it was too late. Is it just me, or have "juggalos" become the idiots that ICP hated on in these first few releases? Just look at any juggalo story you find online. ICP would have never stood for that shit - back in the day, at least. The stupid, toothless, idiot fucktards that ICP spent so much time hating on have become their main fan-base. Dafuck?

Anyways, on with the review! I can't help it that ICP themselves have fallen into a PC-friendly formula, churning out a bunch of crap that isn't really rap or hip hop...or anything of any substance come to think of it (after the Joker's Cards finished they fell the fuck off, and hard), but when this act emerged out of the murky smog of Detroit in the 90s, they brought with them a slightly disturbing, yet wholly unique performance and sound. It is more than apparent that ICP took a lot of "inspiration" from (the excellent) Detroit rapper Esham, but so did Eminem, and anyone else who has spat violent shit over a rap beat, but by the time The Ringmaster hit the shelves, ICP were already heading in their own unique direction. When their third full length dropped (this here Riddle Box CD), the group had gained a massive local following and it's own super-funky, nasty hip hop sound, dripping in silly slasher themes and wicked rhymes which would go on to form the basis of the genre 'horrorcore'. I fuckin' hate juggalos, and I fuckin' hate ICP's weak, middle-America-white-majority-pandering material of the last decade - but their early shit is some of the best rap music in the fuckin' world. This shit fuckin' rules!

Musically, this is the darkest ICP record other than the intentionally-grim-as-fuck Hell's Pit. Lyrical themes are in the ballparks of necrophilia ("Cemetery Girl"), cannibalism ("Dead Body Man"), physical and mental retardation ("Three Rings"), paedophilia ("Lil' Somethin' Somethin'"), murder ("12"), murder of rednecks ("Chicken Huntin'"), murder of children ("Toy Box"), murder of public officials ("The Joker's Wild"), murder of pensioners ("Ol' Evil Eye").....you get the picture. And yet, the band thank God in the sleeve notes. I personally don't understand the massive fucking contradictions here, but what can you do? Fuck it. Shit is amazing. 

This was originally released in 1995 on some fucking backwards combination of Jive Records, Battery Records and the band's own Psychopathic Records. Also, please excuse the dire state that my copy of The Riddle Box is in, I haven't exactly taken care of it! 

WHEN ALL SIX HAVE RISEN, THE END WILL CONSUME US ALL.

Björk - Selmasongs (Dancer In The Dark OST)

As far as Björk albums go this has to be the most boring one I have heard so far, if you can even call it an album at only seven tracks in length. Selmasongs is the "OST" to the film Dancer In The Dark, which also stars Björk in the main role. I've never seen the film and don't particularly plan on watching it, but I expected from Björk and all her super-creative weirdness a very challenging and enjoyable self-made soundtrack, but alas all we have here is a bunch of orchestral scores (which are nice in their own right, I suppose) with the odd Björk tune thrown in for good measure. Massive disappointment.

I can't really complain as I only paid £0.01 for this on Amazon (good luck "bricks'n'mortar" record stores!) but I was insanely let down by this short CD. Totally not worth waffling on about, and for Björk purists only.

Intestinal Disgorge - Sociopath

Jesus, where to begin? Ha ha! Sociopath is probably one of the most difficult albums to write about, simply because it's a 40 track long mess of hilarious grinding terror. Intestinal Disgorge might have a name that is typical of the grindcore genre but their sound is entirely unique. I promise you that you've never heard anything quite like this before. Intestinal Disgorge play some of the most hateful, blast-happy, mysogynistic grindcore that I have ever come across. They smash this approach head on with all the silliness in the universe. The results can only be absolutely catastrophic, and that my friends is a bloody good thing.

Each Intestinal Disgorge blast of grind is laced with a whole mental asylum worth of unusual vocal styles - most noticeably their trademark "bitch squeals", which cut through the music at any given time and without any apparent pattern or prior warning. One second you're ripping through some shit-hot awesome grindcore without a care in the world and the next there is this horrendous screaming cutting through that is equal parts worrying and hilarious. Couple that with endless death metal style growls, rabid pitchshifter lows, sung and shouted cleans and the odd King Diamond impression and you should have some idea of what Intestinal Disgorge sound like, that is if you can arrange all of that in your head with going insane.

Opening track "I'm Wearing Your Panties" is an absolute gem of a grind tune, as is "Stupid Fucking Whore Bitch", which channels so much fury and hate for women. I tried to post it on my girlfriend's Facebook wall but I couldn't find a YouTube link, to my endless disappointment. My favourite track on this album though is "Pedofile", which is alarmingly funny as fuck, considering it's subject matter. The "King Diamond" tracks (as I like to call them) that open, close and intermit the album are also great.

I've already got an Intestinal Disgorge split 7" in my collection but finally getting my hands on this Rotten Roll Rex released CD (thanks to Bones Brigade) has rekindled my worrying interest in this spectacularly funny grindcore project.

Agoraphobic Nosebleed / Halo - Split 7"

I think this is probably the hardest thing in the ANb discography to get a hold of. Sure, the Insect Warfare split and the Converge split can fetch rather hefty prices, and Tentacles of Destruction is fairly limited, but for sheer difficulty in regards to unoptainability (is that even a word? *edit - no, it's not), the split EP with Halo currently holds the crown (seeing as I don't have all the ANb shit yet, I won't say for definite, but I'd be surprised if anything else is more difficult to obtain).

The three original ANb tunes are from the Altered States era (they have that sound/feel, at least), and they are the typical old-school ANb stock of uber-fast drum-machine grindcore punishment. What I didn't see coming however, was the Slayer cover that takes up most of their side. "The Antichrist" definitely sounds a lot better with Richard Johnson on vocals, but I was never the biggest fan of Slayer, so I could take or leave this cover version.

Halo are the polar-opposites to ANb, in the speed stakes, at least. Deathly slow drumming and horrendous guitar feedback and low-end vibes make up the main "songs", where sparse but abrasive vocals howl over the top of it all, creating a rather unsettling yet interesting listen. Despite it's snail-like pace, the track doesn't last that long and I am left contemplating whether to search for more Halo material or not...

This was released on Relapse Records a while ago now, and was part of some subscription series. That's probably why it is so bloody difficult to come by. I'm glad I've finally gotten a hold of it though, as it goes towards the inevitable completion of my ANb collection, and it also contains ANb material that isn't available anywhere else, as far as I can tell.

Trivia - did any of you eagle-eyed ANb fans notice that track one is titled "Street Magician" on the cover but the same track is named "Ghetto Wizard" on the inner sleeve? 

Jesus Crost - Fuck Powerviolence...This Is Groovy Gore Grind!

Ok...so Jesus Crost do groovy gore grind now? Dunno when the change over happened exactly, but it happened. Don't get me wrong, the cover art is pretty hilarious considering the usual subject matter of Jesus Crost's material...but other than that...shit....I really don't want to say it, because I hate dissing bands....but this shit sucks ass. Compared to the insane precision and ruthless insanity of material like Tot, this 7" comes across as a bit boring and as a lazy joke. It sounds like a sub-par GUT mixed with some random brutal death metal band, all the while trying to imitate Jig-Ai / Rompeprop-esque polka rhythms. The whole thing just falls flat on it's arse. Please, please go back to fastcore, guys!

The porno sample over the first track goes on for so long you'd swear that Mortician had a hand in producing it. Things pick up around the end of side A with "Rachid Bouaouzan", which has a half-decent groove, but other than that, this thing just goes nowhere. I'm not entirely sure if this record is really as awful as I'm making out or if it is just my own massive personal disappointment in the decline in Jesus Crost's output. That's the thing that hurts the most; Jesus Crost are (usually) so absolutely fucking goddamn awesome. I dunno what the fuck happened here...I'm sorry for the negativity! I'm sure most of you are already know I rarely do negative reviews, but I just gotta be honest with you here... :(

This was put out on Rodel Records. Again, I apologise for the negativity but to quote the internet: "I am dissapoint". Maybe this'll grow on me

Sete Star Sept / Violent Gorge - Split 5.5"

Holy Mother, now this is some abrasive shit! Sete Star Sept are currently my go-to band for extra-nasty noisecore skullduggery, and they do not disappoint with this particular slice of shitgrind vulgarity. Violent Gorge takes things a little bit further. Things start off in the noisecore ballpark, and then subtly migrate into harsh noise territory, as it appears the original "band" recordings are cut, spliced, diced and manipulated to create all manner of auditory discomfort. Imagine Suppression meets AxCx in King Tubby's studio. Ha ha!

 

Uber-DIY and well worth a look-in, you can get this unusually sized 5.5" slab of tinnitus from Grindfather Productions, Mass Deadening, Aggressive Valley, Death, Agony & Screams and Pan Del Muerte Records.

 

No Youtube links for this, sorry!

Total Fucking Destruction / Skat Injector - Split 7"

Wowzers, what a noise! Ha ha! I got this split because I am slowly making my way through collecting the Total Fucking Destruction stuff. I'm not've really been that familiar with Skat Injector, up until now that is. Neil from Legs Akimbo was a legend in finding an unsold copy of this split for me, as this shit is pretty limited now. The TFD stuff here is just some live versions of well known tracks of theirs, but it's the Skat Injector side that really shines.

It's got a centre-hole like Amy Brooke's arse.

Skat Injector is some crazy shit. I don't really know how to describe it; it's like a mix of every possible electronic genre in one big jumbled bag of super-fast, dancable insanity. I'm not sure if the record is supposed to be spinning at 33 or 45 until the vocals come in; it really works both ways, but the correct speed is 33 1/3. 

Released as a collab between Binjuice Erotica, Hirntrust Grind Media and Legs Akimbo Records. Check it out below!

Snuffgrinder - Snuffholic

Ever since I decided to include CDs on Lines In Wax about a year and a half ago I have looked forward to reviewing this album. It's purely one of the most unique things I have ever heard, and every time I scanned my shelf for something to listen to whilst at work, Snuffholic would catch my eye, but every single time I'd think to myself "hmmm, maybe next time". Well, finally that "next time" came around and I took this crazy little fuck out to the car with me for 7 hours of raining hell. I'm not sure if it made my shift better or worse! Ha ha!

 

Snuffgrinder is a very unique project with a very unique sound. I guess it falls under the usually-horrendous "gabba-grind" genre, but without the usual ghastly pitfalls of that particular sound. The best (and most alienating) way I can probably describe Snuffgrinder to the uninitiated is to imagine Libido Airbag crossed with Aphex Twin and a DJ in a fetish swingers club or something....Ha ha! Yeah, that's about right. There aren't really "tunes" here as such, any synths or instruments are very mininal, as are the sparse vocal performances, the entire thing is driven by a pile-driving drum machine barrage of pain, death and anguish. Swans' Holy Money-era nail gun experiments ain't got shit on this motherfucker! Some of the drum hits sound like fucking gun shots, I'll just put it that way.

This album isn't very long, but when you think of it as 14 tracks of pummelling drum programming, it's plenty long enough; it's enough to give anyone a permanent fucking headache, in the best way possible, of course. I'm not sure of the rarity of this release as I got it through a trade years ago, but it was put out on Apathic View Records back in 2006. 

 

Some facts to finish up on: Snuffgrinder is/are from Poland, and when he/she/they talk of snuff, they are talking about tobacco, not snuff films (so readeth thy booklet: "SGR has nothing to do with a crap called 'snuff movies'. It's all about tobacco."). Also, QNZ - the guy who runs Rotten Roll Rex - guests vocals on track 2. Check out some Snuffgrinder carnage in the link below!