Gronibard - Satanic Tuning Club Turbo!

Holy Shit! The French are coming! Armed with turbo goregrind! Fukk!

It might be daftly grandiose to label Gronibard as legendary, but these guys were stalwarts of the 90s/00s silly goregrind scene. A lot of party grind to follow simply does not possess the speed and carnage that these guys pack, especially on this particular album - the fantastically-titled Satanic Tuning Club Turbo! I mean, think about it, tupa tupa shit is becoming the death of party fucking grind. Yeah, it's fun and all, especially live, but I fear it won't be long before we tupa tupa our way off a cliff into stagnation; the base of the precipice littered with corpses stripped to waist, wearing Mexican wrestling masks and clutching half-drank cans of Gambrinus.

Gronibard's high-pitched squeal-orrific vocal approach to blasting mental goregrind is akin to GUT on amphetamine, and may have been a precursor for bands such as Intestinal Disgorge to push this style to the limit. It might sound even more ridiculous, but the acoustic stuff here is my favourite, especially "March Of The Gronibard", which was sent to me over MSN Messenger yeaaarrrs ago, and has been in regular playlist circulation since.

So yeah, if you don't take your grindcore too seriously, and are a bit fed up of endless tupa tupa in your party music, don't forgot underground gems like this; blasting, spastic, rude, insane French grindcore! Fukk you!



Note: The "Turbo" edition throws in the stuff from the split with Gorerotted and Gruesome Stuff Relish, extended acoustic tracks and some other unreleased stuff and live bits and bobs.

Anal Penetration / Gronibard - Split 7"

Another absolutely awesome release from Bones Brigade Records, pairing the craziness of France's Gronibard and perverse, head-rattled drum machine tunes of Anal Penetration. Pressed in 2009 on a run of 500, with 300 on black and 200 on transparent green.

Anal Penetration bring their usual watery, boxy porngrind to the mix, while on the other side of the disc Gronibard take the oppurtunity to crucify Anal Penetration at every given moment, with song titles such as "The Only Reason Why You're Making A Split 7" With Us Is Because You're Desperate To Meet New Guys", "I Don't Need To Be Freud To Know That Calling Your Band Anal Penetration Means That You Want One" and "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire: The Million Dollar Question Who Is The Gayest Dutch Band Ever ? [A] Epica [B] Within Temptation [C] The Gathering [D] Anal Penetration".