Artery Eruption - Reduced To A Limbless Sexslave

(Apologies for the crappy art image, Google crushing the life out of my shit once again...)

This thing has been in Spotify "to do" list for absolutely fucking aeons, and every time I open it I am reminded why. It is if my brain, in some mad coping mechanism, blacks out all memory of ever hearing this album. Usually the human mind reserves this sort of thing for deeply traumatic events in life, like for instance, a car accident or a horrifying sexual assault. But, Reduced To A Limbless Sex Slave is so nauseatingly, traumatically, unbelievably awful that my brain seems to class the experience of listening to it as a horrific life event. 

I mean, I listen to gorenoise for fucks sake. There must be like, what, two hundred people on the entire planet who like that shit. Despite it's tiring tropes, I am also partial to slam and brutal death metal. But this....this is something else. Whoever sat down and thought "yeah, this is a perfectly acceptable sound for a professionally released album" needs their head checked. The absolute crying shame of it all is that I don't think Artery Eruption are all that bad, I just want to know who decided to release an album that sounds like it was recorded inside a decommissioned industrial oven on a Windows 95 laptop with a £5 webcam microphone. 

Pass. For the love of God, pass. 

Splattered Entrails - Nauseate

Before I start this review proper I just need to get something off my chest: just look at that motherfucker above; easily the derpiest looking cover for a brutal death metal record...

Anyway...

Nauseate is a 2011 album by the one man death metal project Splattered Entrails, showcasing a more polished, almost sci-fi approach to the sickening death metal that the name is known for. The opening track "Rewriting Human Genetics" is fucking epic - simple yet brutal as fuck, setting the stage for the proper death metal to follow. "Dawn Of The Great Plague" and the moody "Parasites" are both great, but the choppy, snare-loving "Bathspheric Claustrophobia" is probably my favourite here, although "Buried In Cement" has gotta be a close second.

The guitar has gotta be some of the tightest shit out there but what really does it for me with Splattered Entrails is the intense hammering of the drum programming. It really helps the "band" stand out in this busy sub-genre.

Brutal death, reviewed brutally fast. Go sneak that shit.

Necrocest - Prenatal Massacre

Wow this shit is brutal. Probably one of the best bits of death metal I've heard in a while, Prenatal Massacre is the third full length album from Welsh sickos Necrocest. I remember seeing these guys supporting The Berzerker in Newport many moons ago (2008 methinks) and I had forgotten all about them until I came across them on Youtube recently, because y'know, I'm an idiot, but there you go. All that matters is that I finally listened to them properly.

It took me a while to figure out that there may be a drum machine on the go here. If not, then those are some triggered-as-fuck drums. My hazy memory of their live show includes a drummer, but you know how things are on the production side of death metal; drum machines out the ass. Or, to make that more death-metally; drum machines out the ass, prolapsed cunt and bursting from your stomach like some shit from the Alien franchise. Either way, Prenatal Massacre is fucking awesome brutal death metal.

(Apologies for the image quality - it was very difficult to find a full sized version of the album cover, and Blogger crushed the life out of it during the upload.)

Splattered Entrails - Undercooked Intrauterine Delicacies

Boy, am I happy this saw the light of day! Initially I mistook this release as a new Splattered Entrails album. I was thinking - "shit, they've gone back to the gory stuff!?", but alas it was not to be. Instead though, Undercooked Intrauterine Delicacies turned out to be a compilation album of impossible to find splits that the band did back in the Myspace days. It includes a three-way split/comp on FDA Rekotz and their splits with Chainsaw Dismemberment and Disgorgement Of Intestinal Lymphatic Suppuration (yes!), which were both put out by the now sadly defunct DIY goregrind label, Mental Abuse.

So, what I am so happy about here is that I get to hear a whole bunch of gore-drenched, slamming br00000tality, which for me, is much more entertaining than the band's later, more polished and more sci-fi orientated output. Splattered Entrails is truly a lesson in "bedroom music done right", as this entire compilation, despite spanning three sessions, boasts a stable and chunky production (give or take the odd farting low end on the chug), and a punishing display of drum programming, guitar slammery and vocal putrefaction. Yum yum. 

Granted, there is the odd stinker or two, and now and then I feel that the "ree ree reeeee" vocal style is used a little too much for my liking, but on the whole this is a solid selection of tracks from a legendary brutal death metal project. Out on Sevared Records. 

Prepare your diddlyhole! 

Splattered Entrails - Flesh Out Of The Oven

Back in the Myspace days, Splattered Entrails set the bar on how to sound if you were a bedroom death metal or grindcore producer. I've never been too keen on their, how should I put it...typical death metal vocal style, but music-wise Splattered Entrails is the shit. This guy blew most of the other bedroom musicians out of the water. I think Splattered Entrails is still active, but it isn't really as "dank" as it was back in 2006 on releases such as this. There was this other Splattered Entrails album with a bunch of tentacles on the front, I forget what it was called (edit: it was Choking On The Rot) but it was one of the most unrelenting things ever; an endless world of high-pitched snare blasting and chugging guitars. It was a perfect mix of brutal death meeting the world of drum-machine powered goregrind.

Flesh Out Of The Oven however, is a bit more of a mixed bag. It has a bit more variety to it, for what it is. The whole thing comes on slow in a fade-in with a dissonant riff and double-bass drum programming. What follows can only be described as a veritable journey through all that is bedroom brutal death metal. It sounds ridiculous, and it probably is, but this is some cool shit. I was really lucky to pick this up off Dissected Angel Records, whom I was in contact with on Myspace for a good few years (the guy running it taught me a lot on starting out with a DIY label), because the label seems to have disappeared into thin air, which is kinda sad. 

I really do miss the Myspace days. No current social network exists with the power of promotion for musicians and labels that Myspace had. Those were the glory days of the internet-age extreme metal underground, and I'm still proud to have been a part of it, even if it all fell to shit. Mad feels.

Seeing as this is well out of print here is a download link for it right here. Otherwise, enjoy this Youtube video of slamming goodness. 

Cethalotripsy / Membro Genitali Befurcator - Split 7"

I'll be honest and admit that I only bought this 7" because Cethalotripsy were on it; they are one of my favourite "slamming" brutal death metal bands and are a total guilty pleasure of mine. Man, this shit is so sick! I'm a total sucker for this stuff when it's done right, and Cethalotripsy have yet to fail to deliver the gore-drenched slams. "Ulcerated Mass Of Pestilent Engorgement" is a fucking amazing song name.

Membro Genitali Befurcator are pretty decent as well. Lots of blasting going on here with nice heavy chugging mixed with some more-traditional metal riffing. The vocals are of the usual brutal death stock and the tracks lurch along at a fairly slow pace (for brutal death metal, at least) but the perfomance is more than interesting enough to keep me hooked until the wax ends. I'm not entirely sure what a Befurcator is, and I'm not sure I really want to find out, but these are a band I'll be keeping an eye on. I figure they are fairly new as they don't have much stuff out.

Coyote Records is a name that keeps popping up on my forays of filth into various underground genres, so I'm gonna have to give their entire release catalogue a look over when I get a spare minute or two, but for now you can check 'em out on the above hyperlink, and check out a tune from this split in the below video.